The girl you just called hot? That me
when ur headphone is slowly slipping out of your ea r and you just think no„ my love…, r eturn
last night i woke up because two dudes were fighting underneath my window and one dude kept screaming “BRO!! BRO YOU CALLED ME A BITCH IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE BAR BRO!! THE WHOLE BAR!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT BRO??” he sounded so heart broken. why bro. why did you do this.
my friends and i were playing fuck marry kill at a restaurant and our waiter was gonna ask how our food was but he heard “I’d fuck goofy”and walked away immediately.
how to pick up CHICKS!!
- cup your hands around them protectively
- lift them from the ground
- gently kiss their fuzzy heads
- say “peep peep” calmingly so as not to be pecked
- peep peep